Skinny Bitch

I put a pic from last year up on my myspace account yesterday, and my friend was like, "OMG, awesome pic SKINNY!"

Umm...you sayin' I'm fat now, bitch!?!?

So I know I've gained a few...my excuse is that it's the winter and I always gain a few over the winter and then lose it again when the warm weather comes b/c I run outside like a maniac...I need some meat on my bones to keep me warm during the cold months! So that's what I told her.

Then she says, "well maybe you should start smoking again, I'll bet that didn't help either!"

Haha! She's lucky I love her!

Bird Caller

Now that it's getting nice out, I've started walking though the park again on my way to work. I see so many crazy things/people in the park! Suki, Suki, Suki guy, slugs falling on my bag, Pot in the park...you get the idea.

This morning might have been the best one though. There's this guy that I see kind of often and I think about blogging about him sometimes, but I haven't felt that his behavior warranted a post UNTIL NOW! Sometimes he's just sitting on a park bench w/ his typewriter, laughing and typing away. Sometimes I see him doing karate moves (I assume it's to get his creative writing juices flowing), but today he was...wait for it...

BIRD CALLING.

Yes he was. There were ducks and swans gathering in the water near this guy, and he was making crazy "ca-cawing" sounds and looking through a little square cut out of cardboard. I think he saw me take a picture of him from afar b/c as I was walking by he whipped himself around and looked at ME through his little square! Normally I would've jumped or ran away, but I've seen him enough to know that he's harmless (thank God I was right)...so I gave him a little smile and kept going. He mumbled something I couldn't really hear...prob saying I'm pretty or some shit, hehe...just joking...he could've just as easily been calling me a big bitch!

Bloomies Blunder

Sometimes when I get out of the 6 train at 59th St., the underground entrance to Bloomingdales just sucks me in. This past Saturday, I got sucked in and went straight to the men's section to avoid overspending on myself. There are a few birthdays coming up that I needed to buy gifts for...but really I just like being in there among all the clothes I pretend I can afford (even though it's usually too crowded for me - see #8).

Case in point, I picked out a gorgeous John Varvatos shirt that I thought would be an amazing bday gift! I asked the sales woman if she had a different size in the back, so she went searching...for quite a long time actually...but eventually came out w/ the right size. So I go up to the counter in her section to pay for it (b/c I want the person that helped me to get the commission - I'm nice like that), and she says, "That will be $157." Ummm, excuse me!?!?

Yeah, I thought the price said $45, not $145! I apologized profusely about my mistake (she was v. nice about it), put the shirt back, and walked my cheap ass out of there as fast as humanly possible. To think I was SO excited and proud of myself for having a great eye for upscale, reasonably-priced clothing. Ha!

Bragging Bitch

At Crush's Wine 101 last night, it was just Richard and I and two other girls at our table. They were nice enough, and by the end of the night we were all BFF since we got just a bit tipsy! I thought it would be fun to start bragging that we were going to Nobu 57, which is so unlike me (even though I'm a big bitch)!

I mean, I love to go to fun, hip, trendy places, but I'm not one to brag, so I surprised myself! I literally said, "I don't mean to brag, but I will..." Richard goes, "KIMMY!" I don't know what got into me! Obv that was some damn good wine! What a bitch!

Back and Still Bitchy

Boy, I've missed you all! I don't even know most of you that read this silly thing, but anyway...

I was up at the new house all last week and kept myself busy by sunning myself on the beach in my basement. I got tons of color! Ok enough about the house. I don't need to update you on that except to say that we have fixed the flooding problem temporarily and it will be permanently fixed come summer. There.

In all seriousness though, I ripped my shirt. Put my elbow right through the damn thing. And I love this shirt. I wonder how many people saw the big hole all day. To make matters worse, I have plans tonight. Wine class w/ Richard, then sush at Nobu 57! Fun fun! Hopefully no one notices my hole tonight. That would be gross.

Welcome to Our Wading Pool

I've been in major stress mode all week; so stressed that I couldn't even bitch about it! Don't get me wrong, I bitched plenty verbally, but I didn't have the heart to write it all down yet. Now I do.

'Boyfriend' and I bought on a ski house this past Friday upstate. Sounds amazing right?!? Well, it is, except for the fact that just hours after we closed, our basement flooded! And not just the a cement/pipes/non-liveable basement, but a finished basement w/ a carpet and exercise equipment and washer/drier. Ugh! Here's how it all went down...

We did our final walk-through in the morning, and everything was fine...went to the lawyer's office for a couple hours (Yay! We have a house!)...went to lunch to celebrate...went shopping for cleaning stuff, food, supplies, etc.

We got back to the house around 8pm at which point I went down to the basement to put away the laundry detergent and stepped into 2-3 inches of water! I turned on the light, saw that water was everywhere, went into shock and started yelling to 'boyfriend' to come downstairs. Oh my goodness, I can't even tell you how bad it was. And this is our first house, and on the day we closed!!!! We understand this kind of thing happens...we are homeowners now (in the words of our dads), but you have got to be kidding me! We had planned on cleaning, decorating and enjoying the house and each other all weekend! Instead, it was just a mess...trying to get all the water out, tearing up some of the carpet, praying to God that it doesn't happen again! We still don't even know the cause! We have a contractor and insurance guy coming next week. In the meantime, we have pumps sitting down there in case whatever happened, happens again.

Welcome to our wading pool...

Speaking of Reindeer Games...

I have a zit coming in on my nose. Right smack dab in the middle of it, and it's so big and red already that I look like Rudolph's long lost cousin. Ugh. Boyfriend can't even look at me without getting that scared look in his eyes (he's joking of course). He's effing lucky I'm a good sport!